"THE HANDLEBAR CLUB"

(A REPORT)

        About a year ago Windmill Comedian JIMMY EDWARDS, became sadly aware of the 'dropping off' of large moustaches as worn by members of H.M. Forces during the war.

        Himself the proud possessor of a fine Pilose appendage, he gradually formed an idea to promote the growth of moustaches by forming a fraternity of wearers and, as soon as he was ready to launch the scheme as a club, he was featured in the EVENING NEWS with suitable description of his aim. Several setose sympathisers wrote to him approving and offering to lend their hirsutage to the venture and function as Founder Members. A nucleus for the Club was thereby formed with some really beauteous shoots.

        At precisely the time at which JIMMY EDWARDS was mulling over the possibilities of starting his idea, Cartoonist-Author BILL HOOPER, the pictorial creator of "P/O Percy Prune", was being exuded from the ranks of the R.A.F. with a gratuity, a suit of 'civvies' and a large moustache. He spent the first, part-wore the second and so was caused to cash-in on the third. To this end he began a research into the evolution of the moustache and the history of hirsutage which resulted in a manuscript which described "The Dawn of 'Down'", "Down Through the Ages", and an outline of Primordial Pilosity. These were included in a list of Hints to Expectant Moustaches, the advantages of wearing a large moustache and a chapter which touched lightly on "Pest of the Pile". Later Bill HOOPER televised these in a series of lectures and invited JERRY COLLONA, radio and screen star of BOB HOPE's programme, to become New World Advocate and American President of the club he was about to form under the auspices of the Ancient Society of Pilositors and Guild of Hirsuters. JERRY COLLONA was willing to 'play' and so the club was almost launched. When JIMMY EDWARDS and BILL HOOPER became aware that they had got their wires, or anyway, their whiskers crossed, they met and amalgamated. April Fool's Day 1947 saw the joining of their efforts and this event was marked in a suitable style by PATHE GAZETTE in a film in which JIMMY EDWARDS, Windmill glamour girl GERRY OLDHAM and B.B.C. Author FRANK MUIR took part with BILL HOOPER, with female preference for large moustaches being well featured.

        The new Vice President JIMMY EDWARDS, Secretary BILL HOOPER and Founder Member FRANK MUIR then decided to launch the club in a suitable atmosphere and liquid refreshment. A 'shaker' was then provided by two A.C.2 Cadets of the R.A.F. who appeared by chance at the same bar with two of the largest moustaches that the new Club Officers had ever seen. Sympathetic but Seta-free KENNETH H. BANDY, WINDMILL Press Representative, soon had the EVENING NEWS photographers to 'cover' this meeting and Cadets LAZERUS and JJONES were immediately entered as Provisional Members. It was explained by Lazerus that his and JJones' moustaches had been 'under snow' at their camp and this probably accounted for the lush appearance and admirable lengths of the two sets of upper-lippery which in the Spring sunshine of Piccadilly presented a magnificent sight of Auburn and Ginger, true harbingers of Spring and the success of the Club.

       On April 3rd, B.B.C. commentator STEVE GRENFELL interviewed a few of the WINDMILL Starlets at the microphone and canvassed their opinions of men who wore large moustaches to be recorded for a broadcast "London Column" to North America. Later in the broadcast, Vice President JIMMY EDWARDS, gave a history of events leading to the club's inception and his particular moustache’s history during his Service career. Founder Member FRANK MUIR gave an effective and spirited advocation of the wearing of a lush growth with a clever line in warning notes to inexperienced moustaches. Secretary BILL HOOPER added a series of answers to the WINDMILL GIRLS criticisms regarding hirsute hygiene, and the broadcast was concluded by the Club's Officers holding a meeting before the microphone Later the press again recorded the proceedings, and photographs were taken by P.A. -Reuter and the EVENING NEWS.

        From this report on the clubs launching, applicants, members and founders will agree that the large 'tash' is intent upon coming into it's lush own with the help of unstinted publicity.

        The first inaugural meeting will be held on Sunday, April 20th at London's WINDMILL Theatre at 5.30 p.m. at which Founder Members will be nominated, plans discussed and a suitable hirsute applicant nominated Honorary President for the year. (Members intending to be present at the meeting should ask at the Windmill Stage Door for the Handlebar Club, between 5.15 and 5.30 p.m.)

        Meanwhile men, "Grow for Victory" - "Keep 'em growing". . . . . And if you can keep yours on when all about you are losing theirs, you'll be a man, my son, and what is more, you'll have a 'smasher'.

Yours sincerely,